Coming soon to a garage near you. Right near you. Your own, in fact:
Nestled deep in H.R. 4173 is a provision for "Low Carbon Transportation Development". Taxes and deployment are restricted to red states. Benefits are seen to be:
- Reduced rubber usage.
- Elimination of unfit, bitter, clingy citizens.
- Training infrastructure requirements.
- Decreased hydrocarbon usage.
- Decreased food intake, as you and your teammate can't reasonably shop for more than four bags of groceries anymore.
- Increased Olympic cycling competitiveness.
Oh praise the Hope and Change regime!

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